Disclaimer: I think I might have gotten a bit carried away.
I’ll start out by saying this, I’m a horrible person. This has taken me forever to write, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I guess you can mostly blame the endless stream of colds, and the reference in the last sentence. (I also think I don’t write myself well.) And now I’m straying into complaining territory, so without further rambling I give you:
From behind the stage curtains, a face peered out at the crowd. The amphitheater was packed with half-bloods, minor gods, and a few undead VIPS from the underworld. The guest of honor, Mr. D, sat looking bored as ever. They had tried to find a more willing participant, but when Zeus had turned them down in favor of a lightning storm raging across the south west, he had insisted Dionysus would take his place. The face retreated behind the curtain, and Kitkatgirl200 looked down at her clipboard. It was seven minutes till showtime, and both the contestants and Aeolus were missing.
Kit walked up to one of the nymphs who were helping backstage. “Have you heard any news from Aeolus?” she asked. “I told him at least to be here thirty minutes ago.” The nymph stared at her for a moment, then blinked her thorny eyelashes.
“Nope. Same as when you asked three minutes ago.” She said before flipping to an article called trims and fertilizer in her magazine.
“Thanks for nothing, again, Rose.” They’d done the same thing at least four times in the past fifteen minutes. Kit held up her clipboard, hitting herself in the face. “This is going to be a disaster,” she muttered. Rose was just about to utter a snappy comment when they both heard the sound of glass breaking. Kit pulled the clipboard away from her face, looked over at Rose, then smiled. “That’ll be them.”
“What makes you so sure?” Rose asked, looking up from her magazine.
As Kit ran off towards where the sound had come from, she called back, “Wherever Jason goes, chaos follows.”
In the hallway, three disoriented half bloods lay tangled on the ground.
“Get your foot out of my face!” Jason yelled from the bottom of the pile.
“Jason, shut up,” Hannah replied, standing and brushing herself off. She helped to pull Rebecca, whose arm was still in a sling, to her feet. Jason scrambled to his, slipping on the glass before giving Hannah a glare.
“This isn’t all of you, is it?” Kit asked, looking down at the list of names. “There are supposed to be thirteen of you. Each.”
“So that’s it? No ‘sorry for the bumpy ride’ or ‘would you like me to go say sorry to the couple in Central Park you lost your lunch on’?” Jason asked sarcastically.
“I wasn’t in charge of transportation, Aeolus was. If you have any bones to pick, go to him.” Kit started to walk off, then turned around. “He’s not here though, so just… “ She swatted at the air, like she was shoving away any questions they might have. “Anyways, come on, were set to start in…Oh look, four minutes. Yay.”
As they went quickly down the hall, there was a beep, and Hannah announced “Becca just texted me, she’s on her way up the elevator. Seems she found a way to avoid our transport.”
When they reached backstage Kit looked around, distressed. “Now where’s Rose gotten off to? I need to ask her about Aeolus.”
“Whose Rose?” Rebecca asked.
“Rose bush nymph, lives in a pot outside Demeter’s temple.” She swung her clipboard around. “And she’s supposed to be helping me! Nevermind, you three get out on stage. I’ll be there in a second. Literally. Also, as soon as the curtain rises, your voices will be magically amplified. So if you have anything to say that you don’t want the rest of the building to hear, I’d say it in the next forty seconds.” She said that all without stopping to take a breath, then disappeared further backstage. “Okay,” Hannah said. “Rebecca, do we have a plan? Strategies? Any secret weapons?” At that moment Becca ran up to them, gasping. “Well, that was fun,” she muttered sarcastically. Kieran followed closely behind, not looking quite as winded as her teammate.
“When’s the challenge starting?” Kieran asked.
“Plan?” Becca added.
“You know,” Jason said, “I can hear everything you’re…saying.” He looked around as his voice vibrated around the room. “Well, I guess that’s our cue.”
As they walked out onto the stage, Kit, who sat on a stool towards the other side of the stage, waved at them to go stand behind the five podiums that had been set up. “You missed your cue a long time ago,” she said.
The five contestants went to their respective spots, and Kit turned to address the audience. “Welcome everybody, to the first ever game of Family Feud: Greek Edition!” There was feeble applause from the audience.
“That’s a mouthful,” Becca whispered. “Why did we ever decide to call it that?”
“Ask Louis,” Rebecca whispered back. “Now be quiet, they can hear us.”
“The game is simple,” Kit continued. “I’ll ask the contestants ten questions, then, the team that answered the most right gets to spin a wheel for a prize. Contestant’s, please introduce yourselves.”
When no one else said anything, Jason spoke up. “Jason, son of Hermes, leader of the Red Team.”
“Rebecca, daughter of Athena, Blue Team leader.”
“Hannah, daughter of Athena, Blue Team.”
“K-Kieran, daughter of-” Kieran stuttered, froze, then fell behind her podium, disappearing from sight, over come with stage fright.
“Becca, daughter of Aphrodite, Blue team!” Becca yelled out before driving behind the other podium to help her team mate. She popped back up a moment later. “She’s fainted!”
“Oh good! Now Jason is only outnumbered three to one!” Kit said, then she turned so the audience couldn’t see and mouthed sorry, she’ll be fine. Let’s just get this over with. She turned back to the audience. “Alrighty, first question! Apollo’s Roman counterpart is?
Hannah hit her blue button, a buzzer that was a bit too loud rang out. “Apollo!”
“Correct! One point to the Blue team! Okay question two, Janus is the god of?”
Buzz! “Doors!” Jason yelled. “And? Kit asked. “Uh…Death?” BUZZ!
“Ooo, nope. Incorrect. Blue Team?”
“Doorways, choices, beginnings, and endings,” Hannah said calmly.
“Correct!” Hannah stuck her tongue out at Jason. Kit ripped of a page on her clipboard. “Okay, three…What is Hestia’s sacred animal?
A hand reached up from behind Kieran’s podium and hit the buzzer. “Cow?” Becca’s voice asked.
“Cow?” Jason said.
“Nope, and nope.”
“Crane!” Hannah called.
“Need a hint?” Kit asked.
“Yes!” Rebecca said.
Hannah hit her buzzer three times in a row. “Hestia’s animal is a crane, as said in a…scroll.”
“Then am I wrong?” Kit asked as she ruffled through her clipboard.
“Why don’t we ask Dionysus?” Rebecca proposed.
Kit suddenly stopped. “Good idea.” Kit pulled a cellphone out of her pocket and dialed a number. After ringing three times, she set the phone on the floor like it was on speaker phone.
“I didn’t sign up for this,” a grumpy voice rumbled from the back of the room.
“I know you didn’t, now answer the question, Mr. D. What is Hestia’s sacred animal?”
“It used to be a Crane, but after an incident at a party at Olympus, she decided to change it to a Donkey. I was there, matter settled.” There was a loud beep, then Kit picked up the phone and pocketed it. “Umm, thanks,” she muttered. “Alright then, point to the Blue Team then?”
“Jason, you didn’t even try to answer!”
“But I didn’t get it wrong.”
“Jason be quiet,” Kieran muttered, sitting up from the floor.
“Kieran told me to shut up, you should deduct a point.”
“Quiet! Now, here, this one can’t be contradicted. Camp Jupiter consists of which legion?
Buuuuuuuz! “Twelfth!” “Twelfth!” “Twelfth!” Hannah, Becca, and Rebecca all shouted at once.
“‘Nother point for the Blue Team!”
“Wait what?” Jason said. “You lost me.”
“Next question!” Becca said.
“Trivia is the Roman form of which goddess?”
“Hecate!” Hannah yelled.
“Stop answering correctly, I’m running out of things to say!” Kit complained. “Correct.”
“Woo! Hannah!” Rebecca and Hannah high-fived.
“Question I’ve lost count: Which of the seven demigods in the Heroes of Olympus has supposedly never lived in California?”
“Piper?” Becca said.
“Mr. D?” Jason asked, confused.
“Leo!” Rebecca said.
“And that one goes to Rebecca!”
“Piper? Connor? Juniper?” Jason continued to ramble off names.
Kit started laughing, then took a breath. “In which book was the character Gleeson Hedge first mentioned?” she asked, before laughing again.
“The Lost Hero,” Rebecca said confidently.
“The Son of Neptune?” Becca asked.
“Who?” Jason mumbled.
“The Last Olympian?”
Becca punched the air. “Whoo!”
“He wrote a letter to Grover,” Kit clarified. “Let’s see…This is question seven or eight…Name at least three famous heroes who were trained by Chiron.” At the exact moment she asked the question, Jason got distracted by a fly.
“Hercules,” Rebecca said.
“Achilles,” Hannah said.
“Perseus,” Becca yelled, then began to ramble them off, counting on her fingers. “Bill, Jason-” Jason smiled at the sound of his name. “Not you, Jason- Aeneas, Theseus,Peleus, Oileus-”
“That’s good Becca, you’ve already named three.”
“Don’t. Now, the Oracle of Delphi now resides in whose body?”
“Rachel Elizabeth Dare’s!” Rebecca said, without hitting her buzzer.
“Blue Team again. Poor Jason,” Kit said. “The others are going to be mad at him.”
“What is the score now?” Rebecca asked. “Isn’t it eight to one?”
“Think so.” Hannah said. “I bet now he’s regretting escaping!”
“Alright, final question! Who ordered for the Sword of Hades to be made?”
“Persephone!” Rebecca yelled, immediately.
“And the final question goes to the blue team, with a score of nine!”
Hannah jumped up and yelled, “WE WON!”
Jason crossed his arms, sulking. Rebecca patted him on the shoulder.
“W-we did what?” Kieran asked, standing up. “Was I out the ENTIRE time?”
Becca laughed, “Yup!”
Cheesy music began playing, and Kit led the Blue Team to the back of the stage, where a large wheel stood. “There are five different monsters on the wheel. The team member of your choosing may spin the wheel, and whichever monster it lands on can be set on the Red team at any time. Ready? Whose spinning?”
“How about you, Kieran, since you were unconscious the entire time.”
“Oh…Okay.” Kieran stepped forward and looked closely at the wheel. It was in six pieces, five had different names of monster on them, one was an empty space, like the wheel above the Nemesis cabin. A pit scorpion, three basilisks, a flesh eating sheep, a flock of Stymphalian Birds, and a storm spirit (courtesy of Aeolus.) Kieran gripped the side of wheel and spun it with all the force she could. It went around, and around, and around until it began to slow, then stopped on…flesh eating sheep.
“Well,” Kit said. “That’ll be an interesting one.”
Suddenly Jason said, “I want a re-match.”
“No. No no no no no.” Kit said.
“Why don’t we ask you some question?” Becca said, looking at Kit.
“No… NO, no.”
“What is the name of the character who REALLY hates cheese?”
“Who was the prisoner with a one on his shirt?”
“Who was the only one to win Artemis’s heart?”
As they asked Kit questions she didn’t know the answers to, they began to walk off stage, and as the curtain closed, their voices faded into silence.